Midnite Buffet

It's just after midnite and I closed my eyes thinking I can sleep after an hour of reading in bed. I find the last thing I want to do is sleep. I'm once again overwhelmed by so much emotion I don't know where to stuff it. Not to be a martyr or be a superheroine, but I can literally count on one hand the # of times I've cried as a direct result of dealing w "my news." I'll spare you the details. It seems what brings me to tears more than anything is the outpouring of love and friendship I've received from friends and family the past few weeks, especially the last. So about a minute or two ago I started creating a list of all the little things that got me through the past week since surgery + for which I'll be forever grateful. In no particular order:

1) Flowers, flowers, flowers. Despite my hopless rotting green thumb, they're all still thriving in my now cancer-free apt. Hopefully I'll be able to maintain the one green plant I got but I'll make no promises.
2) My beautiful pink orchid candle that I'll lite when I get my good news this Thursday. I know it'll be good. It just has to be!
3) Dani hauling her ass to BI in an access-a-ride van at 8:00 am to see me off to my surgery. Dana picking mom + me up in her very own access-a-ride Dodge for what could've been an awful cabride home w/me dry heaving in the backseat. Thanks guys, you were like bookends holding me up.
4) Seeing mom actually sleep(!) on my couch after mental exhaustion. I knew she was getting a well-deserved, much needed rest.
5) The coffee delivered the next day at 6am.
6) My entire family. Their phonecalls, questioning, "being there," delight in any good reports I shared, wishing they could relieve me of "this burden", and so much more.
7) The doctors+ nurses, as well as my bosses for paying for my health insurance.
8) Laughing at goonie googoo (if you don't know, don't ask)
9) Chocolate brown miniature poodles.
10) Books, fancy soaps and chocolate.
11) Visitors and more visitors.
12) The perfect weather we had all week.
13) Demorol.
14) Sports bras.
15) Phone and email messages.
16) Kleenex which is saving my computer from being waterlogged as I write this.
17) Karen walking for the cure and raising more and more dollars. Thanks for all the donations, people!
18) Pink ribbons.
19) The internet.
20) Tumor Humor.
21) The comfort of my apt.
22) You all indulging me by reading this blog.

There's so much to be happy about I don't know what to pile on my plate first.