Chemowhaaa???

OK, we're making progress. I met with two oncologists last Friday and have decided that I will work with Dr. Keith Brunckhorst. Not only did he meet me on a day he typically does not see patients, he took my history, gave me a remarkably thorough physical and spoke with my mom and me, all within 2 1/2 hours and that's all for a $50 co-pay.  Did I mention that he personally called me Friday at 8:00AM to ask me if I was able to come in AND he worked around MY schedule? Unbelievable.

Key take away points:

• My cancer is estrogen-progesterone receptor positive. Like last time, this means my hormones are fueling the cancer. The pathology report still has not come back with the HER2 report, but more than likely I will be HER2 negative. (This would be good; HER2 poz means more aggressive cancer.)
• Because my cancer is hormone related, it's considered good because I might respond well to more hormone therapy.
• That last statement begged the question, then why didn't the five years of Tamoxiphen I was on work for me, especially when I had some pretty favorable odds that I'd have no recurrence for 10 years? Well, apparently my body resisted it. More than likely the "seed" broke off from my original tumor and planted itself in my lungs years ago. Chances are that had I even gone through the chemotherapy back in 2007, I still would have had this recurrence.
• Both doctors were disinclined for me to start with a hormone therapy program in lieu of starting chemotherapy ASAP. Sometimes these hormone therapies kill the cancer on their own, however, it's too late for me to test it out. Their effectiveness would not be determined for several weeks and if they didn't work, that's weeks I would've gone without a more surefire plan.

So, what is the plan?

Well, option one is fabulous. Take blahblahblah with a side of blahstuffstuff and the side effects kind of suck but may be managable. Option two is get an IV of cantpronouncethename with some whateveritscalled and the side effects get suckier. Option three is, get a port and take itjustkeepsgettingscarier with moreblahblahblah and you might go into heart failure and vomit, but you'll have no hair to pull back when your head's in the toilet and some other shitty stuff. By the way, Elizabeth, you'll probably get all of these treatments at some point during the rest of your life, we just don't know in what order.

I chose door #1. It's actually a PILL, the only chemo pill around (I think) and is called Xeloda (Zeh-low-dah) It works for three types of cancer, one being metastatic breast cancer (mBC). Remember, this is breast cancer that metastasized in the lung, it is not lung cancer. Typically it's taken twice a day after meals with water for 14 days, off for seven says, then back again for 14. Three times around is considered a full cycle. If I experience side effects, I immediately call the doctor and he will adjust the dosage. I will probably be on this medication (or some form of chemo), assuming it's working and side effects aren't horrific, indefinitely. I am not at all sure when hormone treatment gets thrown into the mix. The good news? I probably won't lose my hair and, for the moment anyway, I won't have to throw my body into menopause.

By Friday I hope to be approved for a Pet Scan. Assuming the cancer has not metastasized anywhere else in my body (start praying--yes, even you athiests), I can then proceed with the Xeloda. The Xeloda comes from some special pharmacy and I get to pay some special price, so special, the pharmaceutical company offers patients a special payment plan. Ain't that special.

Months ago when my super amazing, loving, shmoopy boyfriend, Sandy, learned I had my lumpectomy five years ago on Rosh Hashana, he said that was a bad move. I said why, I've been fine so far. Then I had my needle lung biopsy on Yom Kippur of this year, coincidentally five years to the day of my first surgery, and the results came back showing no cancer... See?? I'm fine!.. And then everything turns to shit right before Channukah. I've been pondering denouncing my religion all for the sake of my health, but when I explore my options I realize that the food isn't as good and I might start paying retail, and that just doesn't work for me either. So here I sit unwrapping gold foil chocolates  and spinning dreidels asking myself, how many hours after taking my chemo and water do I have to wait before I go swimming before I get cramps? (For you gentiles, that's a Jewish joke reference.)

The biggest take away I really got is, this is not curable, it's treatable. The hope is to get rid of the tumors spreading on my lungs and prevent more from developing. I'm being treated with palliative care, a term I used to think only referred to those waiting to pass in hospice. It's slightly terrifying especially if you read a lot on line. I've decided I will no longer take advice from Dr. Web MD, but rather only those doctors that actually see me in a blue robe with the opening to the back. There is progress being made all the time and there are lots of things (e.g. diet, exercise, cut back from three to two packs a day) I can do to help fight the C -word.

When asked how I am feeling, I sometimes weep, and I cannot predict when that might happen. Ask at your own risk. I still get a bit winded from the surgery. I'm not sleeping that well but when I do, my cough subsides. The cough is a symptom of the cancer and might go away when the cancer's killed off. If I happen to cough in your presence and you have a spare cough drop, I'll take it. Just not the melted one with a hair on it that's been sitting in the bottom of your pocketbook since the Nixon era. Got some bottled water? I'll take that, too.

I will do my best to update the Boob Blog on a regular basis. Please feel free to post comments or if you want to personally catch up, text and email is best until I'm no longer chalking (choking and talking simultaneously).

Thank you everyone for your well wishes, your thoughts, your prayers, your love, kindness and compassion. I'd like to thank my agent, the Hollywood Press...............damn, wrong speech.

With love and hugs,

Elizabeth

P.S. Thought you'd enjoy this video!
Post surgery, shopping in Wegman's with Sandy.