Last I wrote I was terrified for what today would bring me and so far it's been just fine. It was explained to me that the smaller weekly doses of chemo would be more tolerable than a large dose every three weeks. If there are going to be any side effects, I will notice them within the next couple of days. Dr. B told me to expect some joint pain.
My day started with my usual morning cuppa and tuning into the talk shows I hate but attempt to watch hoping maybe I'll find one segment of interest. I had no trouble figuring out what I'd wear to my first chemo treatment because yesterday I received an awesome Wonder Woman costume from my sis-in-law Susan; I was so excited that it fit and that I had the perfect red shoes and lipstick to match! What you can't see in the photo way below is that I am in fact wearing a red cape. On one return from the bathroom, I was so stoned on Benadryl, my shmoop was dragging my IV for me and while we walked by the doc's office I said, Look, Doc, I'm flyyyying!! Ah, I crack me up. I love my doctor but I think he needs a super hero lesson because he thought I was dressed as Rambo. What the...?
The chemo process went like this.... Before I left my apartment, I took a big green pill called Cimetidine. Essentially this drug is to protect my stomach from getting upset. Took an invisible cab to the office just like NYC Wonder Woman would do and first thing Nurse Cathy did was take my vitals and then brought Sandy and me to the IV room. I was seated in a pinkish vinyl Barcalounger type chair that Sandy was oddly very fond of. After little success in finding a cooperative vein, I had a heating pad applied to my opposite arm which apparently makes the veins pop out a little more and then we were rolling. The first IV I got was the steroid Dexamethasone which is to help prevent an allergic reaction and nausea. Well, there's really no polite way to convey what occurred next. As the nurse was preparing the next IV of Benadryl, I started squirming in my seat. I was really embarrassed by what I was feeling but after a minute I had to ask, Is it normal that it feels like someone is pricking my privates (I actually was a lot cruder than that) with pins and needles?! She started laughing and said it's "normal" (trust me, it ain't). Was this some sort of cruel joke? I swear it was like someone took a London Plane Tree aka ITCHY BALLS TREE and shoved it into each orifice and swooshed it around like a toilet bowl cleaner! The top of my head was getting hot and prickly, too. Whew. It was pretty short lived but really uncomfortable. Then the nurse said, Soon you're going to feel a swooshing going around in your head. Swooshing? No, that wasn't a swooshing. It felt like some one turned the nitrous oxide dial up to super fly high. I was floating down the bowling lane like The Dude in The Big Lebowski Gutterballs scene.
After waiting a half hour for this all to kick in, the Paclitexal was injected into my new cocktail.
 |
| Itchy Balls |
 |
| The Dude |
Speaking of kicking, another side effect of the Benadryl is wanting to kick your legs off. You get overwhelmed by a restlessness and start kicking hoping your legs'll snap out of it. And then I had to pee really bad. So I'm stoned, I'm kicking, I don't know how I'm going to make it to the loo, but somehow I did twice with the help of the Nurse Cathy and Sandy (forming a bond I never anticipated until I was like 85 years old). In between all of this I slept a lot in the Barcalounger.
Next thing I knew it was time to leave and although I was told I could go back to work if I wanted to, I thought a new born kitten would be more useful than me so I went home and passed out for three hours, woke up in a big sweat and thought two days has passed.
The good news is that a) I feel fine now and b) I only need to take the steroids and anti-histamine one more time assuming I have no allergic reaction. If I do ok the first two times, it means I'm safe for the following treatments. As far as how many treatments I will need, no one knows. The idea once again is to see some of those tumors shrink. If it's successful, then MAYBE I go on some sort of hormone treatment but it's a complicated call because my body may or may not go into menopause and if it appears to but is really not, I would be taking aromatase inhibitors that won't actually be doing anything. It's a lot to digest and we'll just cross that bridge when we get to it. The other reason I might stop is if the neuropathy (tingling in hands and feet) gets bad. So there are a lot of unknowns. Tons of drugs out there, but it's a matter of finding out which one is the right one for me. The proof'll be in the scans to follow.
Next step? I go wig shopping this weekend. I'll be visiting two places, Joseph Paris and Bits and Pieces. I have a few great, compassionate hair dressers in my circle who are more than willing to help and I'm just going to try and have fun with this.
Thank you so so so so much for the presents, cards, emails, texts, support, encouragement and love you send my way. When I get a little scared I realize so many people have gone through this and as my friend Katia said, it's just a season. At night I watch some funny TV before going to bed, then turn on some mellow tunes and look to Infinity because she makes me feel at peace.
eLiz.
F U Cancer!
My lunatic Wonder Man who made me laugh all morning. I love you.
Infinity...
You are a wonder, woman. You're my Shero.
ReplyDeleteXX's